Monday, December 24, 2007


Dear Al Gore,

There is a lot of snow. It is hard to walk and it is cold. Why does this happen?


PS - Now there is a lot of melting because it is warm in December. Please explain.

Jo-Jo prize

Dear Al Gore,

Last week, I brought the rest of a package of holiday Jo-Jos from Trader Joes (never mind how many "the rest of the package means"). Needless to say, depsite my office instituting recycling, they don't yet recycle the plastic cookie trays that hold the delicious Jo-Jos. So, I brought the tray home to recycle it there. I think I should get a prize - more Jo-Jos?

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Ecological Impact of Ecological Research

Dear Al,
I am avoiding working on my research proposal studying the effect of an invasive species - the red-eared slider turtle on the threatened red-bellied turtle and comparing that effect to the effect of habitat fragmentation and ease of human access. That sentence was way too long. I try not to print articles I can access on line or save electronically but I leave my bed room light on 'cause the dog's afraid of the dark and I leave the radio on for him. The school has these huge E85 friendly SUVs that we take to go trap turtles. Not that we have any E85 to put in them but even if we did - E85 is just as energy intensive - possibly more - as regular gas. I have endless examples. Do you understand my dilemma? I should really finish writing that report now.

Monday, December 3, 2007


Dear Al Gore,

This past weekend we killed a tree for Festivus. Forgive us? We will compost it appropriately, and I will plant two new plants in its honor.

Cameron, Mark, & Felix


Dear Al Gore,
Today my condo association decided to get a compost bin for us all to use, instigated of course by yours truly. This is supported in large part by the town of Brookline, where we live, they are offering the following deal. An Earthmachine composter for the bargain price of $25 (they normally retail for $80+). From the flyer, "The Town is able to offer the bins at this low price with the support of a grant from the Massachusetts Department of Environmental Protection." We are all excited to do our part to reduce our impact on landfills!

Yay for the the town taking advantage of state grants, yay for the state offering them, yay for my condo association!

love & happy holidays,


Friday, November 16, 2007

Art imitates blog

This editorial cartoon by Mike Lester was published in the Rome News-Tribune, of Rome, GA. While I have a feeling it's meant to mock liberals as godless heathens, it could be taken in a number of ways, many of which are respectful to the last democratically elected President of the United States. Perhaps Mr. Lester was inspired by this blog?

recycling at work - yay!

Dear Al Gore,

Very exciting day at work. Normally, those of us environmentally concious employees need to make extra efforts in order to recycle anything beyond paper (we each have our own bins in our cubicles). Now, finally, there are bins on every floor for plastic, glass, and aluminum cans. Plus, we have updated our water dispensing options such that we are not buying bottled water anymore. My father, and you, would be proud.


Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Even Babies Can Save the World!

Felicitations Mr. Gore,

I was only born 6 days ago, but my Mom says even I have to do my part. So, despite the fact that she uses disposable diapers and wipes (she's just dealt with too much poop in her career to contemplate cloth diapers, etc.), we walked to the grocery store this afternoon, instead of driving like all the other suburbanites in our neighborhood do (and yup, Mr. Gore, the grocery store is a 5 minute walk up the street), and she showed me how to bag our groceries in a reusable bag. It really tired me out, but I'm glad to help!

When I grow up, I'm going to get a Nobel Peace Prize, too!

Felix (as dictated to Mom while she fed me - the environmentally friendly way!)

consumer consequences

Dear Al Gore,

Since I am home sick, I have been browsing the net more heavily than normal. In my surfing I came across a consumer consequence game via Apartment Therapy:Green. I thought I was doing a good job of being a responsible global citizen, but now I am despondent. Do you have any advice for me?

Thanks in advance!



Dear Al Gore,

Thanks for the personalized book in honor of my one year anniversary. I look forward to reading "An Inconvienient Truth" and letting it inspire me further during year #2 of my marriage.

How many years for you and Tipper?

Thanks again,

Thursday, November 8, 2007


Dear Al Gore,

I know that we should not turn up the heat because it wastes energy, but it's freezing here (relatively, since I live in N. Cali) and I don't live in an energy-efficient home. I am bundled up with socks and sweaters and blankets, but my feet are still cold. Please can you tell the landlord to put the heat on? I'm too cold to dial her number.


Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Where do you stand?

Dear Al Gore;

Many many of the Democratic Presidential candidates have come out in support of the WGA and their strike.

"I stand with the writers," Sen. Barack Obama of Illinois said from his campaign headquarters in Chicago. "The guild's demand is a test of whether media corporations are going to give writers a fair share of the wealth their work creates or continue concentrating profits in the hands of their executives."
Notice how no Republicans have pledged their support. Guess it wouldn't sound so good for them to declare: "Actually, artists don't deserve to make money on their works. We support mega-corporations."

But where do you stand? And, what muffins do you like? I'm really lusting for a muffin. Perhaps it's just because I've been watching reruns of Strindberg + helium.


Monday, November 5, 2007

Long hair = eco-unfriendly mess in the bathtub

Dear Al Gore,
My housemate and I have a problem. We both have long hair which clogs our bathtub drain. Now, I have recently discovered that if I brush my hair, less of it ends up in the bath tub. However, this does not keep enough hair out of the drain to keep it draining properly. I have found that Drano is quite an effective remedy. My concern is the ingredients: hypochlorous acid, sodium salt (sodium hypotchlorite) and sodium hydroxide. I don't think it's a good idea to release Drano into the environment. In fact, the Material Safety Data Sheet says (under safe handling and use) "Steps If Matl Released/Spill: In case of spill/leak flush area with water. Keep out of watersheds and water systems." How can I keep it out of watersheds and water systems if I use it to unclog my drain! What can I use instead of Drano?

Sunday, November 4, 2007

Oughtn't I flush?

Dear Al Gore;

Every morning I use the toi-toi before I take a shower. Sometimes, okay... quite often... I forget to flush. But do I? My fiance yells at me. Sometimes she beats me. (If I'm lucky :-)

So it brings up this question... when should we flush? Yes, yes... even with that spare two-liter of Pepsi I once decided to recycle stuck in my toilet to reduce the amount of water used in each flush... I still have this question. I mean, doesn't it waste "waste" water no matter how few times I flush?

Granted, I'm not advocating pooing in my fun-bucket multiple times, but is pee-pee really that bad? Okay, after asparagus... yes. DEFINITELY yes. But really, if I don't flush before taking a shower... is it THAT bad? It's not like I peed in my honey's coffee cup. Though I did that to my baby brother once. He thought it was apple juice! G-d, two year old's are SO gullible. Anyway, that was another time.

SO... what would you do? Outhn't I flush?


Friday, November 2, 2007

which is worse

Dear Al Gore,

Which is worse, leaving my laptop open all the time - letting it sleep on its own and wake up when I touch the mouse


Opening and closing it constantly throughout the day?


And the DVDs? Who will care for them?!

Dear Al;

So the writers are going on strike now in Hollywood. And one of their demands is that they get paid more money for DVDs. Which brings up a question for me -- aren't DVDs unrecyclable yet too easily scratchable? I mean, I just bought a used DVD recently (trying to, you know, re-use) but it was unwatchable... both the content and the DVD itself. I guess that's my fault for buying Jack Ass the Movie though.

But it pains me to think that this DVD will be around long after me, sitting in a dump, another relic of mankind's waste.

Hey! Wait a second, didn't you make a DVD too? How did you handle it (besides making it so awesome that no one would ever throw it away)? Is your's secretly made of recycled gum-drops and pie-in-the-sky?

And finally, as a "writer" on that little-project-you-did, are you going to be striking? I hope so... cause then at least one (shoulda-been) President will have visited our fire-damaged state.


Thursday, November 1, 2007


Dear Al Gore,

Today my mommy told me that the condo association voted to remove the ivy from our building and bleach the roots (she used bad words). I'm very sad because I enjoy the privacy the ivy affords us here. I like to hide behind it while I watch the world go past my favorite window.

I realize ivy is not native to North America and can be invasive, but since this ivy is here and not hurting anything, shouldn't we keep it alive? Mommy told me that plants use up CO2, which helps counteract the processes that contribute to global warming.

Please advise.

Love and nose kisses,

PS - Please send catnip. XOXO

Icky Question

Dear Al Gore,

Many of us here at "Dear Al Gore," have been concerned lately with how to properly recycle items with foodstuffs still attached. I come to this forum with a slightly T.M.I.ish, slightly icky variation on that theme.

You see, chez nous, my husband and I recycle about three times as much as we throw away, and we compost as well, cutting down on food waste in our "trash." What I have noticed, is that bathroom trash makes up a pretty significant part of what we do throw away. You know what I mean: snotty tissues, waxy q-tips, cotton balls with toner/astringent and dead skin cells clinging to them. Now, I know all of these items are actually recyclable in their pristine state, but can I (should I?) recycle them when they're sullied with human detritus?

The next time you're taking a break from saving the world, please let me know your feelings on this matter.

Much appreciation,

Monday, October 29, 2007

helping out.

Dear Al Gore,
I know that most of my letters about how I feel there is a lot injustice surrounding doing the right thing by the environment, I just wanted you to know that our dog Jackson does his part! Whenever he encounters a stray box, piece of paper or other type of recycling, he does his best to get it ready for the recycling plant, by ripping it to shreds. He makes fast work of almost any paper product, especially boxes and magazines. I feel certain that he does this to aid in decreasing the amount of resources it takes to recycle.

My husband and I have worked hard to instill a strong commitment to the environment in our family, even our dog helps out!



Dear Al Gore,

Today my bestie ate the leftovers from her burrito. We stored this leftover in the fridge in the original tin foil, inside the paper bag we received from the dining establishment. After she was done eating she asked me where to recycle the various items. The paper bag was easy, with the paper recycling, but the tin foil posed a challenge. The tin foil was covered with food stuffs and my recycling bin is outside our apartment in the hallway. Our building has in the past had a rodent problem so I don't want attract further pests into the building with the promise of scraps of food on my recycling, yet trying to scrub the tin foil seems like a waste of water and gas (which is what is used to heat the water heater).

Tell me what should I have done?

Thanks in advance for your prompt attention to this pressing matter.


Can One Man's Cologne Change Global Warming?

Dear Al Gore,

As a Nobel Peace Prize recipient with a fancy medal, you are, now more than ever, a positive role model for the American male. Please inform your followers in that population that wearing too much cologne (so much so, that an elevator reeks of it after your exit and nauseates a poor pregnant lady) cannot be good for the environment.

Surely, something that noxious is contributing to global warming?

Many thanks in advance,

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Vermicious Knids


So much has transpired these many nights since we danced the Macarena on Saturday Night Live...Where to start? Let's talk about me.

After being rebuffed by the Patent Office regarding my invention of the "Surgical Nose Hair Shotgun" (they argued that aside from being an obvious extension of prior inventions, it may not pass ATF muster), I have successfully settled into a groove as a cricket confuser.

When a home full of family-loving Americans is troubled by the pesky chirping of these vermicious knids, I simply stalk up Hutu style amongst them and shout Hutu warrior chants. While they didn't work as well against the Tutsis, it befuddles crickets like a Hamburglar in a Central Indiana nunnery. It requires a different sleep pattern than I am used to, but the crickets just aren't as precocious in the morning.

From what I can tell, you have been up to similar endeavors with your environmental mish-mosh and whatnot. I hear that's going well. Actually, a 2.7 degree increase in sub-tropical temperatures will wipe out the cricket population, and POOF! there goes my empire. So, keep it up, smelly.

Love and smooches to The Tipmeister.

Friday, October 26, 2007


Dear Al Gore,

I know that Jackson wrote you a letter bemoaning the endless amount of rain, so instead, can you send it down to Atlanta? The whole south, even, would be great. And then you can send the thunderclouds to rain lightning on the heads of corporate america who have not only contributed to this crisis, but denies its very existance. Sprawl developers are bad too.

Thank you,

Thursday, October 25, 2007

SoCal Query

Dear President Gore,

It is only due to extraordinary fortitude (and some exigent personal circumstances that I will not expand on here) that I have not spent the last 6+ years on a massive drinking binge. I have a wonderful social support system and a loving family, and I became a father just over a year ago, so I have many wonderful reasons NOT to drink, up against the gang of greedy warmongers running the country. It's been a close call some days, but I've done what I can:
I've spoken to people one on one about the complexities of Middle East politics in general and the lack of wisdom and lies behind the war in Iraq in particular;
I've sent CARE packages to soldiers in Iraq;
I've helped like-minded friends keep their wits about them;
And most of all, I've kept the faith and kept telling myself, "This too shall pass."

I want to take this opportunity to congratulate you on your share of the Nobel Peace Prize and your continuing efforts to raise awareness about the human role in global climate change. I am making a sincere effort to reduce my use of non-renewable resources and fossil fuels, both directly and indirectly (e.g., no longer buying bottled water, recycling absolutely everything I can, even if I didn't use it to begin with, etc.). I'd love to know what steps you've taken to reduce your own impact on the environment, but my real question is this:

What the hell is Jimmy Carter's problem?

Yiftach Levy


Dear Al Gore,

This past week has been very stressful for me. I have many friends and family in Southern California and the fires have not been easy on them. While its hard to find direct causality between global warming and fires in southern California, I feel confident that you can find it and tell me about it. Also it doesn't seem good for nature that one of the ways to fight the fires, is to throw a chemical retardant on the fire. Can you please come up with a better solution?




Stupid Apartment

Dear Al Gore,

My apartment is too hot. The building sets the heat too high, and even though all my radiators are set to "snowflake" I have to open windows to be comfortable. This wastes fossil fuels!

Please make the stupid condo association set the heat lower.


PS - I hate this apartment anyway, so please make the stupid couple who moved into my old apartment leave so I can move back there and be properly thermo-regulated.

Mr. Gore, I know you can do it!

Dear Al Gore,

I know you're not actually in the government at present, but could you use some of your magical powers to make the government give the MTA of NYC more money (and then make the MTA use that money responsibly)? Then when extreme weather conditions that are caused by global warming hit, the MTA won't shut down...

Thank you, MR. Gore. I know you can do it.


(posted for Alexa Z.)


Dear Al Gore,

I don't like rain. It makes me wet and cold. Plus, it means I can't play with my friends in the park. I can handle one day of rain, as long as it is followed my many days of not rain. What can you do?


(as dictated to me)

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Start Local

Dear Al Gore,

Do you think Veronique should run for the local council? They could really use more progressively minded people, someone who truly represents the populace. I think that some of the most effective politics is local, and I think Veronique would be swell. How did you start out?


p.s. You're dreamy.

thoughts on my commute

Dear Al Gore,

Could you please do something about the Massachusetts Turnpike Association's foolass toll-hike proposals? I do not feel it's appropriate that I pay inflated tolls just because I have to get to my job everyday. I would love to take a train, but the rejects at the MBTA can't get a Commuter Rail to me at the right times.


PS, please be my baby's godfather?

the first post

it should be noted that my friend harmony at b-school inspired me to do this. i welcome suggestions and additions
If you would like to be a regular poster just leave a comment and i will make you a blog author.

here is a link to my first published letter to al gore.